Last week, I ventured to write about caregivers’ grief and other expressive emotions associated with making the decision to place the ailing companion animal, suffering from an incurable affliction into the realm of forever sleep.
I mentioned that the veterinarian, who has in all likelihood cared for the pet during its entire life, is not immune to emotional distress. Yet, it is the veterinarian, who has to explain to the caregiver that, even with the best home and Clinic care, the prospect of euthanasia has to be factored into the conversation, notwithstanding the fact that, in some cases, the infirm and suffering pet can be made a bit more comfortable with medication and appropriate home care (TLC).
Nevertherless, when the companion animal’s existence is conterminous with incessant, progressive and incurable sufferation, from which there are no longer options for improvement, then (I always argue) we owe our companion animals the final dignity and empathy. I also maintain that while we can send humans to the moon and can carry out incredible scientific tests, we have not conquered pain-not on a long term basis.
So, after he family has made the ultimate decision, the veterinarian, and his/her trained staff, Will comply by competently and painlessly infusing the sedative and soon thereafter, the anesthetic. The veterinarian would have discussed with the caregiver(s), the matter of disposing of the body of the pet. Usually burial is the accepted undertaking.
Not seldomly, soon after the burial, the physical absence of the pet and the memories of the years spent together, begin to create all sorts of thoughts in the caregivers’ minds. It has been my experience, observing for over five decades of post-euthansia behaviour displayed by caregivers, that the sorrow and grief morph into manifestation of guilt and fervent expressions of sadness. The erstwhile pet owners just can’t believe that “Rex” or “Sheba” is no more. They exhibit signs of listlessness and fatigue and are unable to focus. It is a fully understandable consequence which scientists and medicos consider to be a normal part of the grieving process; the outcome of a profound individual multidisciplined experiences and relationships.
DOUBTING THEMSELVES:
How often have I not heard the plaintive questions:
Doc, do you think we did the right thing?
Could we have waited a bit longer?
Did I miss the symptoms which might have presented themselves earlier, and why did I not detect the abnormality sooner?
Should I have researched a second opinion?
Such questions are often accompanied by intense exhibitions of shock and denial.
Veterinarians, in the past had not been exposed to the psychology/psychiatry relative to grieving owners, or, for that matter, those disciplines associated with dogs. However, relatively recently, popular shows e.g., “Ceasar the dog trainer”, and popular scientific books e.g., “Inside a dog” by Elizabeth Horowitz have come a long way in ensuring that veterinarians are better equipped to deal with grief after the euthanasia of a loved pet.
Cornell University’s College of Veterinary Medicine has dealt comprehensively with this matter: http//www.vet.cornell.edu – stages of grieving.
Researchers in Human Medicine have also established varying stages of grief which might be worthy of a read. In a nutshell, they are:
Denial
Blaming self/others
Anger
Questioning Science (in)capabilities (why can’t we do more on permanently alleviating pain?)
Depression/ withdrawal / reliance on others (especially seen in children)
Hallucinating
Acceptance
Grief is very personal. One’s expression of grief is different form another. The family should not be judgmental and show empathy for those members who are exhibiting one or more of the manifestations listed above.
The caregiver must recruit and maintain a support network of genuinely sympathetic family members and friends to help cope with the loss of a pet.
Finally, you would have noticed that I have not written about the disposal of the animal’s remains. This discussion is important, not lastly because of the possible environmental impacts. That particular discourse between the companion animal’s caregiver and the veterinarian should be concluded prior to performing the euthanasia exercise.
