Just another day …in the land of vacuity

Your Eyewitness is pretty sure that, like him, most of you, dear readers, didn’t notice that last Sunday was “World Book Day”. Yawn…yes it was!! He was too taken up dealing with mundane matters, like getting that next meal in this age of galloping inflation, to pay much attention to whatever went on to commemorate the day! Did ANYONE do anything?? But there’s a larger question that needs to be asked: Do we really need to read books??
Now, don’t get your Eyewitness wrong. He has no problem with READING, as such. He just has a problem with reading BOOKS!! And this isn’t some recent fad. Back when he was sent to school in short pants – which exposed his knobby knees – some teacher literally beat out of him whatever chance there was of loving books!! Being a tad precocious, he already could make out words on pages by that time, thanks to his patient big sister. It was the books the teachers insisted he read that scarred him. He just couldn’t stand that Rampat family, or Pat and Roy!!
But seriously, folks, your Eyewitness’s motto when it comes to reading books is: The person who only reads books but doesn’t put what he reads into practice is really wasting his time!! Cause that’s the only way you can tell whether the book served any purpose!! And as he grew up in Guyana, nothing happened that disabused him of that notion. Take our early political leaders – Burnham and Jagan. Burnham was a fella who just loved reading. The man could even read in French!! Which is still all ‘Greek’ to your Eyewitness!! Burnham said he particularly loved reading a book by an Italian fella named Machiavelli – and that’s pretty much why our country was ruined!! Machiavelli was a plotter par excellence, who wrote you gotta look out only for number ONE. And the Devil take the rest!! And take us he did!
Jagan also said he loved reading books – but HIS favourite was by a German fella named Marx. And what did that do for him – and also for us, since he was our earliest leader?? Got him kicked out of office by the Americans, that’s what – and us kicked from pillar to post since the 1960s!! So, do you blame your Eyewitness for being a bit leery about books?? So, he’s pleased as punch that, nowadays, with a smartphone in his hand, all the information he needs on anything is right at his fingertips!!
Reading books also makes you forget to think for yourself.
So, he does a lot of thinking (with his eyes closed!) about whatever needs to be done, then fact-checks the plan he came up with!! Voila!!

…to destroy Earth
The day before “Book Day” was “Save the Earth Day”. And if it’s possible, your Eyewitness is even more cynical about this day!! As usual, there was a theme – this time, “Invest in our Planet.” Now, what the heck was this?? Invest?? Doesn’t this theme give the perfect cop-out to those who’re doing the greatest harm to the planet?? Haven’t they been telling us for the last 200 years – think the “Industrial Revolution” – that they’ve been doing just that??
The thing is, no one’s really concerned about the Earth – they’re just concerned about themselves. So, what we ought to be doing is to talk about saving ourselves – and our descendants!! As Guyanese, let’s talk about saving our coastland, where 80% of us live – yet we’re busy building all kinds of fancy high rises on the oceanfront, that’s gonna be swept away by the sea. But most of all, it’s the developed world that caused the problem of who should be talking – and walking the talk!!

…in paradise
Your Eyewitness spent last weekend at one of our coastal resorts. And he can report that, even though he’s seen the white cliffs of Dover and the pyramids of Egypt, the beauty of our scenery beats them hands down!!