Resentment can stir up a spirit of seeing yourself as a victim threatened by a person who instills doubt or fear. His or her opinion of you may infect you with a low self- image, a lie about yourself that blinds you to your true identity. The one you resent robs you of your freedom and inner peace, and makes you a discontented person. Nagging discontent, in turn, can create an inner emptiness.
Envy has been defined as the desire of that which isn’t yours, and the begrudging of the individual who really possesses it. And the object of the coveted possession may not be merely material possessions, but could cover a wide-ranging cornucopia of desirability: such as good looks, a job, academic achievements, social popularity, ability to overcome difficult circumstances and advance despite inhibiting constraints, among a plethora of others.
The twin sins of envy and covetousness have destroyed many relationships, and laid waste to lives and the quality of life of those victimised because of the greed, envy and covetousness of others.
According to philosopher and student of human behaviour, Lansing, “covetousness is the desire of that which is not yours, and is presently unattainable as it belongs to someone else or lies outside of your ability to get.” But he should have clarified “… to get except by nefarious or criminal means.”
Commenting on the negative emotion of jealousy, Lansing posits: “People get envious in a relationship once they really feel that someone else is trying to destroy, steal, or take over that romantic relationship. A lady will get jealous when she thinks her guy is spending as much time with, or around, an additional woman. A man will get jealous when he sees an additional guy flirting with his girlfriend or wife.”
Victims of those who are covetous, envious and/or jealous often revert to defensive emotion, which seeks to protect the victimised individual from the actions of those who do not choose to suppress their negative emotional traits. Some become depressed and withdraw into themselves, while others react in multiple other ways, sometimes even leading to violence.
In the biblical Book of Proverbs, jealousy is deemed as ‘the rage of a man’. Those who possess the negative emotional traits of envy, jealousy and covetousness are often irrational, and most times act with vindictiveness and spitefulness toward their victims. The psychological attachment to things coveted, and the envy of the possessor by the covetous, can have dire consequences, and afflict the object of desire as well as dependents; such as the instance of a spurned lover burning down the house of a woman, who is cremated alive with her children. Thus these emotions can become lethal if acted upon.
A blog on the page of the popular Greg Gardner posits: “Covetousness will be the emotional desire for, and attachment to, something that isn’t yours and is presently unattainable. The Bible clearly forbids us to covet our neighbour’s wife. Once we allow a psychological attachment and desire for someone which has reserved himself or herself to another person, we’re strolling on a very treacherous floor.
“You can say that it’s covetousness that produces envy. When a partner starts to covet an existence outside of his relationship, he is certain to provoke his spouse to jealousy. When a lady starts to covet a man currently married, she will provoke that man’s spouse to jealousy.
“Covetousness is a signal of discontent. If you are beginning to appear outside your marriage for a happy existence, plainly you have to get assistance with your relationship. This discontent often provokes other people to jealousy, which only compounds the problem.”
Discontent with one’s lot could be a precipitator for striving for enhancement of one’s life and lifestyle; or it could induce one to harm the object of their desire; or to wrest the coveted article by violent or criminal means.
Rancorous feelings toward someone emanating from envy and/or jealousy of that person, or greed and covetousness for the possessions of someone else, can lead to situations of conflict that could very well be avoided, if one tries to be content with his/her lot and endeavour for their own upward mobility through their own efforts.
Envy, greed, jealousy, covetousness are bitter fruits of discontent that could poison one’s entire life, inhibit one’s capacity for enjoyment of their life, and dampen the zeal to achieve to one’s optimum potential for personal growth and development. Even worse, the innocent victims of their desires are the collateral damage of their egomania and psychoses.
