Wasn’t me…said Sanction Man

It is said that there’s no honour among thieves. But jeez…not even among thieves who are father and son?? What has the world come to?? Your Eyewitness is talking about the arrest and charge of Sanction Man and his father on the US request when a reporter asked the former about the US gold smuggling charge for which they’d been sanctioned. “Wasn’t me!!” shrieked Sanction Man – in his best imitation of Shaggy!! – “I’m just a gold miner!! It’s my dad who’s the gold trader!!” That’s like throwing his old man under a FLEET of buses!!
And to think it was just the other day the father waxed lyrically about what a genius his son, Sanction Man, was: “He could memorise all the plate numbers of cars passing by!!” That facility must’ve served him well in his gold mining operations in the “bush”!! But then, not everyone who cries, “Miner! Miner!” actually mines, do they?? Didn’t that gold trader who sang like a canary – Sanction Man’s favourite bird, in his own words! – talk about Venezuelan Generals selling Venezuelan gold on our side of the border?? And then it would be useful for Sanction Man to remember the plate numbers of all those upscale cars he brought in without paying taxes!!
But back to the arrests. Sanction Man was quite peeved about the number of armed cops who showed up to arrest him!! But hey!! Wasn’t it he who insisted he was just a choir boy – or its Muslim equivalent! – and was being persecuted by the big, bad PPP? And who boasted about the Scrapes from Albuoystown who idolise him?? Wasn’t it reasonable for the police to guard against a mob of Scrapes creating mayhem to free Sanction Man??
Hadn’t the Police seen Sanction Man’s Scrapes in action after he sicced them onto stored in Gtown after Adrianna’s autopsy?? And didn’t the said Scrapes show up at the Magistrate Courts when he was booked?? And didn’t they scream their heads off to “Free Mohammed” – when he was already free on bail?? And didn’t all the businesses in the area – including all the lawyers!! – send home their employees early, fearing the aforementioned police-anticipated mayhem?? Mo Money!! Mo Money!!
Anyhow, your Eyewitness is taken aback – far back!! – by the conspiracy theories being spun by Sanction Man’s handlers!! One is that the timing of the arrest was to prevent him from entering Parliament – where he’ll be crowned “Leader of the Opposition”!! Now one would’ve hoped his battery of (PNC) lawyers had informed him his offences were bailable and he’d be out in a jiffy – as he and Pops soon were!!
But then the victimhood card plays well with Scrapes, no?? And lawyers’ money gaffa mek!!

…said Norton
With just one more day to the start of the Thirteenth Parliament, it looks like Norton’s fighting desperately to gain some kind of credibility – after the trouncing he received at the hands of the Scrapes who deserted their old home in the PNC to vote for Sanction Man!! Imagine he came out swinging at the Police Force for “overkill” in arresting Sanction Man!! So what’s his angle?? And in politics there’s ALWAYS an angle!!
Is he trying to score points with Sanction Man or the Scrapes?? Shouldn’t he be figuring out some way he can hang on to the PNC that should be strengthened to make some waves?? Is defending his nemesis – by making him out as a martyr – the best way to do this?? Or is he trying to make sure Chicken Man – whom he placed at the head of the PNC 12 – has a basket to fetch water??
Whatever his thinking is, it just further reinforces his irrelevance to the evolving politics in Guyana today!! Gwan da side!!…

…said Dexter
Dexter Todd was appointed as the PNC’s “shadow” Minister of Legal Affairs for the 13th Parliament. But since the larger Opposition WIN will also appoint their Shadow Ministers, will Dexter be a shadow of a shadow?? Go figure!!