The new…Parliament 

Any day now… I can hear the Speaker of the National Assembly – Manzur for a repeat performance? – introduce President Ali to address the brand-new 13th Parliament of our fair Mudland. Lots of folks don’t realise it’s the President and the National Assembly TOGETHER that make up “Parliament”, and they’re in the same place rather infrequently!! But your Eyewitness wonders – not so idly! – whether, this being the THIRTEENTH Parliament and all, it’s gonna be unlucky!!
Your Eyewitness is very disappointed with WIN’s leader, Sanction Man, for what he’s seen of the list of persons he’ll be sending to sit in that august body!! What kinda democracy is he practising when – after snagging the votes of the majority of Scrapes in the land – your Eyewitness is only seeing the names of doctors and middle-class denizens like Tabitha Sarabo? How the heck can THEY represent the Scrapehead community?? They sound so vacuous when they open their mouths that we citizens might just dislocate our jaws while yawning!!
Scrapes, on the other hand, have colourful opinions on everything under the sun!! And while these may appear to have nothing to do with the topics under consideration, their thought process as to how they make the connection might open up completely new vistas for the Speaker’s rulings!! Take, for instance, expressions he may assume to be lewd, profane and salacious – these are an integral aspect of Scrape communications and semiotics!! It may surprise him to see how creative they can be in using, say, the “F” word!! Is a word vulgar when the speaker – not THE Speaker!! – doesn’t intend it to be so??
Take, for instance, that most voluble of Scrapes who’s come to our notice and goes by the name of “Doggy”. Wouldn’t it be a thing to behold the Speaker addressing him as “The Honourable Mr Doggy”?? One small step for Doggy; one giant step for Scrapeheads!! And yes… it would be enthralling to watch Doggy debate the just-as-voluble Attorney General Anil Nandlall – albeit in a different and more portentous vocabulary!! – on, say, the cybercrime law!! And not so inconsequently, Doggie already went out and bought himself an (admittedly ill-fitting) suit – which shouldn’t go to waste!! C’mon, Sanction Man – let’s hear it for the Scrapes’ representation!!
So, while Sanction Man will be leading his troops into (hopefully verbal) battle in the National Assembly, he’s gonna be sitting alongside Chicken Man – who was delegated to head the PNC/APNU delegation as the junior Opposition party. But while Sanction Man was quite diffident in sending the full gamut of colourful characters to Parliament, Aubrey Norton – retaining the party leader position – did send Black Pudding Man along!!
Your Eyewitness hopes HE clarifies whether Doggie’s a BT Licker!! Ouch!!

…madness
Up to now, we’ve had to deal with that madman on our west known as Mad Maduro. Seems he’s joined by a mad woman – his VP, Delcy Rodriguez, who we know from presenting those ultimatums to the ICJ on their border controversy. In the face of the US taking action to deal with drug trafficking with an armada, she vented her spleen on us pipsqueaks and T&T for supporting the Yanks.
“And from here, from Sucre state, a very clear message to the vassal Governments of the United States Department of War, the Government of Trinidad and Tobago, and the Government of Guyana: take it easy, do not dare, and do not even think about it. You are lending yourselves to the perverse plans of an aggression against the people of Bolívar! It is a strategic scenario for us in the supreme defence of our Essequibo territory!!”
Imagine that!! They’ve mobilised their troops and militia to defend Essequibo!! Anyone who doubts the wisdom of our strategic choice should chew on that!!

…electricity vista
With the foundation being poured for the Wales GtE 300 MW generating plant – and one in Berbice coming up – happy days are here not only for us consumers but also for businesses. Cheaper energy’s gonna encourage investments and create jobs!!