Satiricus was on the back foot once again. He was at the Back Street Bar with the boys, knocking back a few beers and of course the discussion had turned to the conclusion of the budget debate and the delegation of MP’s to All Boys Town.
“Budday! All the doctor said was the warehouse was storing medicine,” Satiricus said heatedly. “And this was what he proved to everyone who went over to check.”
“Me na bin know dat condom a medicine,” said Bungi said with a smirk.
“Yes. A 10,000 square foot warehouse full of condoms and jelly!” grinned Hari.
“Let me ask you something, Mr Know it all,” Satiricus said heatedly to Hari. “What is a medicine?”
“Well, something that cures an illness,” Hari replied promptly.
“Would you go along with a medicine is something that saves lives?” Satiricus challenged his friends.
“Me can live wid da,” said Bungi.
“Well, suppose I tell you all those condoms were bought because the government wanted to save lives during the next flood?” said Satiricus.
“Safe sex will save lives during a flood?” asked Hari doubtfully.
“You know that one of the greatest needs in a flood is pure water,” said Satiricus. “But did you know you can fill a condom with water and keep it safe for drinking later?”
“I never thought of that!” exclaimed Hari.
“Or you can keep your mobile phone dry so you can make that call that might save your life?” Satiricus continued.
Both Bungi and Hari looked at Satiricus carefully and mouthed, “Oh!”
“Or you can blow up the condoms and use like angel wings to keep you afloat to save you from drowning!” Satiricus was on a roll.
“I never looked at condoms like that,” confessed Hari. “If we get cuts during the flood, we can use the condoms like a tourniquet.”
“Wha’ da?” demanded Bungi.
“You know…to tie off the wound from bleeding,” said Satiricus.
“Yes, me can see da,” admitted Bungi. “Waan time me foot bin get cut wid me cutlass and if me bin gat wan condom me na woulda bleed suh plenty.”
“And in case you don’t have any food, you can always make a slingshot with two condoms and shoot some birds!” said Satiricus.
“OK! OK'” said Hari. “We get it!”
“Leh abee drink to condom!” said Bungi as he clinked his bottle to his friends’. “De warehouse bin gat medicine!”
