Satiricus was a bit grumpy. He’d been talking to his wife’s second cousin Basil in New York who’d been grumpy. And since Basil, who was a real estate salesman, was the biggest contributor of remittances to the Satiricus clan, Satiricus had become grumpy. And if Satiricus remained grumpy, his buddy Cappo who was holed up with him at the Back Street Bar, would soon get grumpy since the beers wouldn’t flow as fast. Or as free, which was even more important. And this Cappo didn’t want.
“Suh wha’ Basil tell yuh?” Cappo asked solicitously. “‘e wife lef’ am again or wha’?” Basil was once the “Village Ram” and had carried his bad habit to NY. His wife would walk out on him when caught…but then return at Basil’s tearful entreaties.
“Nah…After Trump’s revelations, Basil’s wife thinks she’s lucky!” Satiricus said. “He doesn’t grab anybody crotches.” They both smiled.
Stiricus continued. “It seems Basil was one of those fellas who helped Nagga Man and Rum Jhaat in New York, and now they don’t even give him the time of day.”
“Wha’ Basil wan’ fuh hear fram dem?” Cappo asked as he signalled for another beer.
“Well, the KFC and APANU had promised the fellas from foreign to make one or two of them MPs ,” Satiricus explained. “And now…nothing!”
“Hol’ aan deh!” Cappo exclaimed, “Basil only sell waan, two house in New Yark and ‘e wa’n’ MP wrk?”
“Well, he figured he could come back and rent those apartments and condos the government plan to build on East Bank.” Satiricus explained. “Big money!”
“OK…yuh know me na support KFC or APANU,” Cappo made clear. “But how dem wounda pick de MP fram outside? Abee na gat outside votin'”
“They would’ve selected, not elected!” smiled Satiricus knowingly.
“But da na woulda be democratic!” Cappo protested. “An’ na you a de democratic man?”
“Democratic?” asked Satiricus. “Basil told me if he’d gotten through he would’ve gotten some apartments and condos real cheap, boy!”
“An yuh t’ink da prappa?” Asked Cappo sarcastically.
“Well, if Larry can get $400 million, an’ Baby Jesus can get billions,” said Satiricus, “why Basil couldn’t get some condos cheap?”
With that off his chest Satiricus brightened noticeably. Capps signalled for another round. He didn’t tell Satiricus what he thought: that Basil had counted his chickens before they’d been hatched.
