Trump trumps all


Satiricus was caught betwixt and between – and it wasn’t a position he was comfortable with. As a fella without any pretensions to being a brain box, he was always ready to speak his piece – knowing he’d be corrected pretty soon! But how to deal with Georgie, his cousin who was visiting from New York?

The two of them were hanging out at the Back Street Bar with their old friend Cappo, the Canecutter. Satiricus knew politics would be sure to come up…that and religion were always the top topics that kept the joint jumping. Satiricus thought Trump was a great fella and would make a great president of the USA. While Georgie simple loathed the host of “The Apprentice”. The dilemma for Satiricus, was Georgie was also paying for the beers. Should Satiricus risk going thirsty?

And sure enough, Georgie plunged right in when they hadn’t even downed their first round. “Can you believe Trump doesn’t even need to win California tomorrow? The idiot has already won enough delegates to be the Republican candidate.” Georgie sounded glum.

Satiricus kept his mouth shut…but Cappo took the bait. “Wha’ mek de man a wan “idiot”. If suh much ‘Merican like Trump ‘e must be prappa sma’t, All ‘Merican a sma’t people!”

“Listen Cappo, people can be smart but sometimes other people can fool them,” Georgie sounded defensive. “Even the smart people who like Trump saying he will send back all immigrants.”

“But if dey suh smart, dem must know why alyu immigrants should get kick out!” Cappo was smirking. “Maybe alyu tek alyu bad habit ova deh!”

“What bad habits?” snapped Georgie. Satiricus, worried about his funding for beers, was casting pleading looks at Cappo, who either didn’t understand or was ignoring him.

“Well me hear alyu a bribe politician fuh cheat pan mortgage and thing,” Cappo knew Georgie was a real estate salesman.

“Buddy, everybody does cheat in real estate in America. Even Trump get rich in real estate,” Georgie said smugly.

“Budday!! Me know me a wan Canecutta… but me know if Trump bin bribe anybady… de story woulda be pan de front page a dem newspaper!” He looked angrily at Satiricus, “A wha’ yuh kick me fa?”

“Oh…my foot must’ve touched you when I moved. What’s going on now that the sugar crop is over?” Satiricus was desperately trying to change the subject.

“If Trump buy GuySuCo, sugar gon be fine,” replied Cappo. He was not to be deterred. “Suh wha yuh seh about dem sma’t ‘Merican, Georgie?”

“Cappo, alyu Guyanese like talk sh*t about wha alyu na know wan fart ‘bout. Me a guh home.” Georgie left without even paying for the beer.”

Satiricus kicked Cappo openly this time.