The test

Satiricus was very relieved. The truth be told, Satiricus was a fella who didn’t like conflict. In his own words, he preferred to see the cup “half full”. He’d gotten more than a tad tense over the standoff on picking the next Elections Chief. He’d become quite animated as the gyaaf at the Back Street Bar veered to matters political.

“Fellas!! Isn’t it great Pressie made it easy for Jagdesh to suggest a new Elections Chief?” Satiricus enthused.

“Easy?” Hari looked carefully at his friend. “You think so?”

“Sure!” Satiricus smiled. “Now Jagdesh don’t have to guess about who is NOT ‘acceptable’ to him.”

“Le’ abee hear again who Pressie t’ink guh mek wan good Election Chief?” Bungi asked as he sipped his beer.

Satiricus read from the newspaper in front of him, “The person must not be an activist of any form (gender, racial, religious, etc); the person must have no political affiliation; and the person should have the general characteristics of honesty, integrity, faithfulness, and diligence.”

“Suh Mudda T’eresa na guh wuk, right?” Bungi asked, and then answered himself. “She bin a wan religious activist!”

“How about somebody like Martin Luther King?” suggested Hari as Satiricus nodded in agreement. “He was a fair guy.”

“Naah!” disagreed Bungi. “Pressie guh seh he bin ‘racial’ “

“What about Gandhi?” continued Hari, as he looked at Satiricus. “He was a man of honesty, integrity, faithfulness, and diligence.”

“Budday!! He bin deh wid Congress agains’ de British!” countered Bungi. “Political affiliation!!”

“I think Mandela might be acceptable,” Hari said, as Satiricus started squirming in his seat. “When he was in jail.”

“Naah, Pressie guh reject he,” Bungi countered. “E bin use to smuggle out message from jail. ‘E na bin hanest!”

“I have the man Jagdesh should nominate, and he’s right from Guyana,” said Hari triumphantly. “Roy Stone King!”

“Yuh right!” said Bungi as he slapped the table. “‘E gat all dem quality! Da mek dem na fyah am!!”

“OK fellas,” said Satiricus resignedly. “I get the message.”